What says futility better than a 3D recreation of a biscuit released in 1874 by Peek Freans to celebrate the wedding of Grand Duchess Maria Alexandrovna of Russia to the Duke of Edinburgh. The marriage was, alas, a spectacularly unhappy one with Maria stuck in a variety of cold, damp, boring British palaces.

You can change the text if you want. There's a version with a hanger so you can tie it to your Festivus pole. Or not.

How I Designed This

I was just really taken by the polar Greek Key motif that these unassuming Portuguese biscuits use.